Q: Our daughter was married four months ago. A close business associate of my husband’s came to the wedding but never sent a gift. Should we ask him if he bought her anything in case it got lost?
A: You’re better off not asking, because it would be embarrassing for all if no present has been sent. To find out more discreetly, ask your daughter to write him, thanking him for coming to the wedding. The note, minus mention of a gift, might prompt him to ask whether his present had arrived-or remind him to buy a present ASAP.